How to Build a Needs Action Plan

Why you need a plan

Without a plan, needs stay theoretical. With a plan, you practice a shared language—yours and theirs—so daily life becomes a win-win: clearer self-respect, fewer misunderstandings, and more satisfying interactions.

The goal: fluent in the language of needs

Think of this like learning a new language. Fluency comes from short, frequent reps. You’ll get better at:

Naming what you need (honestly, without blame)
Inviting others to share theirs
Making specific, doable requests
Choosing the right people to meet the right needs

Choose the right people for the right needs

Not everyone is the right match for every need—and that’s okay.

Seek people who enjoy meeting the need you’re bringing (e.g., emotional intimacy, clear communication, practical support).
Offer what you enjoy giving. Be honest about limits—time, energy, or skill.
Put the cards on the table early to reduce confusion and “negative surprises.”

Your 7-step Needs Action Plan

List your top 5 needs right now. Example: rest, clarity, support, appreciation, connection.
Match each need to 1–2 people who are likely (and willing) to help meet it.
Define the request (specific, time-bound): “Would you be willing to check in with me for 10 minutes on Tuesday about priorities?”
State your limit (what you can and can’t give): “I can help edit on Fridays for 30 minutes; I can’t take full ownership.”
Schedule the first rep this week (calendar it).
Debrief after each rep (2 lines): What worked? What to adjust?
Repeat weekly for 4 weeks and refine the matches and requests.

Why this works: clear matches + tiny reps + honest boundaries create relationships where both sides feel privileged to meet each other’s needs.

Scripts you can use

Your request:
“I’m feeling stretched and need clarity. Would you be willing to review my top three priorities with me for 15 minutes on Wednesday?”
Their need (invite it):
“What are you needing right now, and how can I help in a way that works for both of us?”
Boundary with dignity:
“I can’t do daily check-ins, but I can do Mondays and Thursdays.”

Common pitfalls (and fixes)

Expecting one person to meet all needs → diversify: different people for different needs.
Vague asks → make it concrete: who, what, when, how long.
Overpromising → name limits up front; offer a smaller, reliable yes.
Taking “no” personally → treat it as data; try an alternative person or smaller request.

Try it: one-page template

My top needs (5): ____
People matched (initials): N1→, N2→ …
Requests (one line each): ____
My offers/limits: ____
First reps (date/time): ____
Debrief notes: What worked / Next tweak

When needs are met, growth unlocks

Meeting your needs moves you out of survival mode. With energy and stability restored, you’re ready for the next level—values. But don’t skip steps: keep practicing your plan until it feels natural.

What to remember

Pick the right person for the right need. Ask clearly. Honor limits. Repeat small reps. This is how everyday interactions become reliable, respectful, and nourishing for everyone involved.

— Sandro Formica, PhD

Founder of Permanently Happy (questions at [email protected])

Keynote Speaker | Transforming Leaders & Organizations Through Positive Leadership & Personal Branding | Director, Chief Happiness Officer Certificate Program